LIWW-Thursday Edition: Opening the lines of communications

Hey All,

I apologize that the Wednesday post is posting on a Thursday… Busy busy busy this week!

For today’s Love is War Wednesday post I wanted to touch on tradition. Specifically, asking the father’s permission. Today, there are still many couples who do this before an engagement, as well as many who scoff at the idea.

For many, asking the father is a sign of respect, but then, why not include Mom? And why is it the guy asking the girl? I think in that case, it’s because guys generally do the proposing.

With us, our parents had kind of set us up and knew it was coming. The night before our engagement dinner, there was a bit of banter that went around like this:

My Husband “Well I’d like to ask for your daughter’s hand in marriage.”

My Father: “What about the rest of her?”

My Mother: “Oh, thank you, he’s been waiting 20 years to say that.”

Heh. But really, had there not been so much talk of my moving and our relationship, not to mention joint holiday meals for awhile, we probably would have approached each others parents. Not as a sign that we weren’t adults or even so much for permission. Really, more because it is a sign of respect.

So what do you think? Archaic, sweet, or in need of an update?

Lots of Love,

Sarah Joy McKenzie

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